it's not the end!!! it's matter how u going to finish!!!
During the weeks....i am questioning myself : '' jane, are you going to give up?? are you stillgoing to be so weak to wait for sympathy and comforts from people?? are you still going to live under the shade of the pains?? are you still going to isolate yourself by stop hoping for any miracles??? are you still going to be a hypocrite?? or else....ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH STRONG?????
3 weeks to go exam is coming.......2 more assignments to due in......1 more heart to be fully heal!!!
Monday, August 31, 2009
never ever......
yea......i had finished my summary presentation today....such a memorable day!!! 31 August 2009, i cried but no for the '' merdeka '' of Malaysia, but for my ''never ever'' 15 mins long individual presentation in New Zealand!!!
hmmm....i didn't really do well yet at least i did it!!! i was the third one who was choosen by random to present my article. Before that, early in the morning, i rush to school lib to print out my OHT.....grateful i managed to print it out anyway.....haha...then i rushed to due in my english group report b4 9.oo am.....hmmm......hectic eh?? rushing here and there like bee..
awwwwwwwww............presentation got started!!!!! i was so nervous......heart is shivering as much as hands and legs......yet, i have a supportive team who are cheering and praying for me as well....i was amazed by their love and care.....even more amazed by the loved ones.....it's my turn to stand in front of ppl to give a brief speech.....nervous and panicked man!!!!
someone did told me '' do your every best to Him!!! He will be a loyal audience and give you the greatest applause for what you had done!!!''
jane '' wow.........i was amazed and impressed!!!''
someone hugs me after my presentation and pats my head and said '' girl, relax...don't be afraid!!! it's all over!!!''
jane's tears fell.............hugging her so tightly.......the first hug i had in NZ with full of love and comfort.......jane's tiredness, fear and sense of lost all lies on her body for a while to rest....so jane cried as she never ever did that in front of friends here......as jane never ever show her weaknesses and pains......as jane never ever dare to speak out.....
someone knows she is tired......she is fear....she is worried....yet she cling on God so much so much as she needs to...
jane did cling on God.....yet, she didn't take out her heart to fully believe Him....as in reality, She rely on ppl more than God.....She knows she cant......
'' when i burnt the paper which is wriiten my secret sins......i felt relieved.....but burst in tears when i was repending my sins by prayers''
hmmm....i didn't really do well yet at least i did it!!! i was the third one who was choosen by random to present my article. Before that, early in the morning, i rush to school lib to print out my OHT.....grateful i managed to print it out anyway.....haha...then i rushed to due in my english group report b4 9.oo am.....hmmm......hectic eh?? rushing here and there like bee..
awwwwwwwww............presentation got started!!!!! i was so nervous......heart is shivering as much as hands and legs......yet, i have a supportive team who are cheering and praying for me as well....i was amazed by their love and care.....even more amazed by the loved ones.....it's my turn to stand in front of ppl to give a brief speech.....nervous and panicked man!!!!
someone did told me '' do your every best to Him!!! He will be a loyal audience and give you the greatest applause for what you had done!!!''
jane '' wow.........i was amazed and impressed!!!''
someone hugs me after my presentation and pats my head and said '' girl, relax...don't be afraid!!! it's all over!!!''
jane's tears fell.............hugging her so tightly.......the first hug i had in NZ with full of love and comfort.......jane's tiredness, fear and sense of lost all lies on her body for a while to rest....so jane cried as she never ever did that in front of friends here......as jane never ever show her weaknesses and pains......as jane never ever dare to speak out.....
someone knows she is tired......she is fear....she is worried....yet she cling on God so much so much as she needs to...
jane did cling on God.....yet, she didn't take out her heart to fully believe Him....as in reality, She rely on ppl more than God.....She knows she cant......
'' when i burnt the paper which is wriiten my secret sins......i felt relieved.....but burst in tears when i was repending my sins by prayers''
Thursday, August 27, 2009
door closed
once the door closed...though how willing you want to get into it.....you can't!!
once the door closed...though how hard you strive to get into it.....you can't!!
once the door closed...though how much you expect to get into it...you can't!!
once the door closed...though how sincere you want to get onto it...you can't!!!
Not understand right??? hahaha......this my feelings now......the door is closed and i am getting tired to break or damage the door because it is impossible!!!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
HAHAHA.....
THE REAL JANE IS BACKED!!!
ALTHOUGH NOT ENTIRELY BUT HALFWAY TO SUCCESS!!!
I AM TIRED YET I AM STILL
ALTHOUGH NOT ENTIRELY BUT HALFWAY TO SUCCESS!!!
I AM TIRED YET I AM STILL
- LIVE CONTENTLY
- LAUGH JOYFULLY
- SING HAPPILY
- LOVE GENEROUSLY
- SERVE WILLINGLY
- DANCE FREELY
- DO DARINGLY
- SURVIVE STRONGLY
- PRAISE GRATEFULLY
- PRAY CONSISTENTLY
YEA.....YO......LALALALALALA.........SMILE FOR MILES!!! =)
Monday, August 24, 2009
fading.....
失去了以前支撑自己的力量，
以前所谓的难兄难弟，
现在全部都消失了，
找不到可以让我放声大哭的肩膀，
听不到以前那么美的鼓励和安慰，
我过得好像机器人一样，
赶着上课，写报告，考试，煮饭，整理家的大大小小，
我很累了，跟本就没办法好好吃和睡，
做在电脑前面，眼泪就会掉不停，
走在人多的路上, 寂寞却在我身边环绕，
开始害怕人群，开始讨厌热闹，
开始学会一个人傻笑，开始习惯一个人哭泣，
长大了吗？放下了吗？原谅了吗？接受了吗？
我只知道我累了，害怕了，担心了，
if can, pls don't ask me '' How are you??''.....If can, pls walk as far as you can from me......If can, pls don't show me you care.....If can, stop giving me any expectations or hopes......i learning to forgive and forget....letting go is not that easy....my life is not that easy....understanding who am i is not easy.....unless you willing.....or else all in vain......i am still trying my very best to survive each moment.....coz that's not easy!!!!!
the next one who is willing to hold my hands tight......
the next one who is willing to give me a single glance.....
the next one who i can lean on and depend on.......
the next one who can open and enter my heart.....
i bless you first.....i thank you also!!!
以前所谓的难兄难弟，
现在全部都消失了，
找不到可以让我放声大哭的肩膀，
听不到以前那么美的鼓励和安慰，
我过得好像机器人一样，
赶着上课，写报告，考试，煮饭，整理家的大大小小，
我很累了，跟本就没办法好好吃和睡，
做在电脑前面，眼泪就会掉不停，
走在人多的路上, 寂寞却在我身边环绕，
开始害怕人群，开始讨厌热闹，
开始学会一个人傻笑，开始习惯一个人哭泣，
长大了吗？放下了吗？原谅了吗？接受了吗？
我只知道我累了，害怕了，担心了，
if can, pls don't ask me '' How are you??''.....If can, pls walk as far as you can from me......If can, pls don't show me you care.....If can, stop giving me any expectations or hopes......i learning to forgive and forget....letting go is not that easy....my life is not that easy....understanding who am i is not easy.....unless you willing.....or else all in vain......i am still trying my very best to survive each moment.....coz that's not easy!!!!!
the next one who is willing to hold my hands tight......
the next one who is willing to give me a single glance.....
the next one who i can lean on and depend on.......
the next one who can open and enter my heart.....
i bless you first.....i thank you also!!!
Sunday, August 23, 2009
a nice song.....
我哭了又哭，我知道我不能这样，不可以这样，但我真的真的好累，累到我好想停下来，好想休息，好想听听你的声音，好想看着你对我笑，什么都不用说地抱着我，但我却假装很坚强，再也不去多看你的一切。。。。你要我做的，尊守的，我都做了。。。但你永远也不会懂我是怎么过的。。。谢谢你总是出现在我梦里。。。。那样就够了。。。谢谢
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Improvement.......
yea........
i did make some improvement in socialising.....tonight, church is having cafe service. Then suddenly in the afternoon cyrus, my lg co. leader asked to whether i can be usher or not...hmmm...without thinking too much, i promise him....yup, when i nearly reach church, suddenly i felt afraid....questions pop up on my mind '' what should i do as an usher??? what is cafe service about?? ''....i did in confusion that moment......haha....
finally, i reached church.....yet i didn't really dare to walk into the main centre coz that's so many ppl la!!! i am fear of ppl........sigh......someone come out and take me in at last....thx dor!!!
start ushering now......we are the'' all black'' ushering team....hehe.....it's quite fun to serve ppl and bring them to their sits....welcoming them.......simple yet i am finally serving in God's temple in nz!!! that really take me quite a big courage to open my mouth and smile with ppl.....yet, i did improve!!! =)
hmmm.....time allows pain fades.....time allows ppl to grow....yet, remember everytime whenever you are being dropped or you are so down....nothing will more than God's love to heal every soul and heart with his amazing works and miracles....
''让爱换个季节再开花结果，
看时间把伤口酿成了收获，
在风雪里最美的还是抱着你，
但也只是偶尔想起的回忆。
让爱换种感情再重新拥有， u comes out in my dream yesterday....
就算失去牵手好那种温柔， ask me not to be fear....
我还是会感觉到你牵着我， i cried to you in that dream........
我会把回忆全部存在心中。" jz cried without saying any words........
u touch my head to soothe me.....
i know your promises will not fail.........
thanks for coming into my dream........
i did make some improvement in socialising.....tonight, church is having cafe service. Then suddenly in the afternoon cyrus, my lg co. leader asked to whether i can be usher or not...hmmm...without thinking too much, i promise him....yup, when i nearly reach church, suddenly i felt afraid....questions pop up on my mind '' what should i do as an usher??? what is cafe service about?? ''....i did in confusion that moment......haha....
finally, i reached church.....yet i didn't really dare to walk into the main centre coz that's so many ppl la!!! i am fear of ppl........sigh......someone come out and take me in at last....thx dor!!!
start ushering now......we are the'' all black'' ushering team....hehe.....it's quite fun to serve ppl and bring them to their sits....welcoming them.......simple yet i am finally serving in God's temple in nz!!! that really take me quite a big courage to open my mouth and smile with ppl.....yet, i did improve!!! =)
hmmm.....time allows pain fades.....time allows ppl to grow....yet, remember everytime whenever you are being dropped or you are so down....nothing will more than God's love to heal every soul and heart with his amazing works and miracles....
''让爱换个季节再开花结果，
看时间把伤口酿成了收获，
在风雪里最美的还是抱着你，
但也只是偶尔想起的回忆。
让爱换种感情再重新拥有， u comes out in my dream yesterday....
就算失去牵手好那种温柔， ask me not to be fear....
我还是会感觉到你牵着我， i cried to you in that dream........
我会把回忆全部存在心中。" jz cried without saying any words........
u touch my head to soothe me.....
i know your promises will not fail.........
thanks for coming into my dream........
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
real or fake??? sincere or insincere??
''real or fake?? sincere or insincere??'' this is the question keep on flashing through my mind each day. Yup, i am doubting with people around me....are they sincere or insincere to me as friend??? or are you being real or fake to me??? or you are just judging on ppl who will benefit you then start to approach to him/her??? undenibly, i am a person who very scared of people either the real or fake ones. Ya, u can say me weird or whatever.....but i do scare of hurts from ppl.
yea....someone told me how realistic the ppl in Uni is, you cant trust anyone even your very good friends...you must have some self-keepings or privacy or else you will probably get hurt!!! I do start observing ppl around me....hmmmmm....they got so many different faces which may confusing me....it's really scary sometimes when you see the other faces of someone who will be so please to you when you are in church but he/she will totally ignore you when schooling. Their motives seem scary to me.....Honestly, i hate the fake faces they had!!! They defeated my confidence and trust on them!!
yea...i am someone who is weak and naive.....i will treat you sincerely if you are good to me.....i wll not think too much or i will not be so selfish....i don't know how to be cruel to somebody who really need help...hmmmmm.....so many things to think of.....
''real or fake??? sincere or insincere?? you can choose what you want to be.......''
but, before that, can i ask a question '' are you really happy with who you are??? even being selfish to ppl??? or ignored the weak and jz sticked with the strong ones??? do you ever feel contented with the success you had gained from being cruel and insincere to others??? are your success surpass the command of God to love others as He loves us?? Is that worth??''
hmmm......small part of my thought today......i did fear of ppl yet will still love them as much as i can!!!
yea....someone told me how realistic the ppl in Uni is, you cant trust anyone even your very good friends...you must have some self-keepings or privacy or else you will probably get hurt!!! I do start observing ppl around me....hmmmmm....they got so many different faces which may confusing me....it's really scary sometimes when you see the other faces of someone who will be so please to you when you are in church but he/she will totally ignore you when schooling. Their motives seem scary to me.....Honestly, i hate the fake faces they had!!! They defeated my confidence and trust on them!!
yea...i am someone who is weak and naive.....i will treat you sincerely if you are good to me.....i wll not think too much or i will not be so selfish....i don't know how to be cruel to somebody who really need help...hmmmmm.....so many things to think of.....
''real or fake??? sincere or insincere?? you can choose what you want to be.......''
but, before that, can i ask a question '' are you really happy with who you are??? even being selfish to ppl??? or ignored the weak and jz sticked with the strong ones??? do you ever feel contented with the success you had gained from being cruel and insincere to others??? are your success surpass the command of God to love others as He loves us?? Is that worth??''
hmmm......small part of my thought today......i did fear of ppl yet will still love them as much as i can!!!
Monday, August 17, 2009
stressed out!!!
once i fell down badly.....once i didn't dare to get up to face.....once i had blamed so much.....once i was so fear.......i still fear now yet God is the courage who never ever leave me.....someone told me all you have to do just leave it all to Him......PLS DON'T CARRY ALL THE BURDENS AND STRESS YOURSELVES OUT!!! u are an imperfect human yet He is a perfect God.....girl, we all are sad to see you stressed out with all the burdens.....God is crying for you also!!! sakit hati tau???
i totally stressed out!!!! entirely exhausted!!!!
i cant write so much in my facebook as i don't want ppl worried bout me!!!
i appreciate the one who really care and willing to sacrifice hiS sleep to listen to me .....cyrus!!!
i appreciate my handsome and smart lifegroup leader who will text me everyday to ask me how everything going on??? r u ok?? didn't you ask??? and lots of useful encouragements for me....build up my confidence.....he seems like my daddy la!!!.....thx dennis!!!
i appreciate my friend who always give me a great hug when i stressed out and depressed......thx dorothy!!! love you!!!
i appreciate all those who are really care and love me........really thx for all your prayers......
once i thought nobody will care.....nobody willing to understand....nobody willing to hear my cries......nobody want to pull me up from the valley.....Yet, i was wrong.....God sent so many ppl who love me in my life......so many angels.....i saw the light out of the darkness becoming brighter and brighter each day......jane appreciate a lots!!!
yup........don't be afraid ok girl??? I will walk with you.......
Sunday, August 16, 2009
hmmmmmm.......
hmmmmm.........
i fear........
~fear no place for me to stay next year.....
~fear that i cant read finish my bio for the test the day after tomorrow.......
~fear that i cant manage to illustrate all the graphs....
~fear that my group members dont want to bother the epidermiology presentation.....
~fear that my english group members don't want to bother the groupwork...
~fear that i will be deducted mark coz i haven't write my journal and i don't know the topic....
~fear that i will fail in my english summary presentation.......coz i don't really understand......
~fear when the moment my cousin sis suddenly get angry and bang the door so loudly.....
~fear when the moment i want to take out all the money to buy groceries and she don't even care.
~fear when i was walking back from the library alone in the middle of the night........
~fear when ppl around me wondering why this girl is always alone in the same place....
~fear when the moment my uncle call to criticize me.......
~fear when ppl around me speak good english but i am not......
~fear when the results are out and ppl compare......
~fear when one day i really collaspe......coz i havent accomplish my mission.....
i fear............really............
~wanna cry yet my tear is so strong......
~wanna sleep yet so much things come into my mind when i lay down.........
~wanna smile yet i am not that happy and enjoy.......
~wanna talk yet i had no more strenght and energy.......
~wanna blame yet that's useless.....
''God.....i called.......You answered!!! i am waiting for Your answer.....You had trained me till so strong in front of ppl......You had trained me not to complain so much.....You had trained me to face my depression....God, i need You so much......really need You so much....''
i stole a phase from cyrus's blog ''unanswered prayers protects....breaks....deepens and transform!!!''
Finally...my tears fall when i am writing this entry.....
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
away.....
the one you care the most is not me anymore....
u can say i am sensitive yet i am not stupid....
i did hurt....where r ur promises to me???
lost it without a reason???
''i love you'' become so random???
ignorance is bliss???
or stabbing my heart had became your habits??
i fear....really.....not emotional...not irrational...not sensitive...
it's truth!!!
Saturday, August 8, 2009
not to us
'' the children dancing dancing dancing, it's all for You!!! it's all for You!!!'' i love this song and that particular phase....motivates me to dance for Him in my entire life!!!!! love it so much!!! Hope u all enjoy it too!!! it's awesom!!!
love this song sooooooo much!!! a great motivation to me to move on each day!!! cool!!!
Friday, August 7, 2009
click....
hooray!!! i went to amelia's lifegroup today!!! i was kinda enjoying it though it was only 5 of pretty girls in that group and i am the youngest among them....haha....we talked and discussed about '' i am who i am named''....now, i realised that there are so many people masked, packed and decorated themselves to find the security which they lost it for a long time. Undeniably, i am also one of the members of them...being a hypocrite!!! It doesn't make us internally happy or joyful. It just make us feel even worse...depressed....or hate till even isolate ourselves...It really need such big courage and willingness to stand up from such deep valley...now, actually i am frustrating about many assignments and groupworks which totally discouraged me.....thinking of giving up sometimes....negative thought always flashing through my mind....what should i do actually?? being bullied because i am asian??? or stand up and speak out all my worries instead or burdening myself each day???
hmmm......i had been tried so hard to cast off my pain and hurts....had been trying so hard to learn to love this place and such great opportunities in my life.....once i thought '' this chance is so cruel....made me even lost who i am...lost the loved ones.....lost my emotion and smile as well...''
Now, i learn to tressure and appreciate as much as i can coz God had given me a great chance and mission to accomplish in my life....there might be a lots of obstacles, barriers and hardships waving with me...yet it is the only way to make me growing and growing each day either in maturity or spiritually....yeah, God is awesom !!!
amelia and annet did encourage me to have faith as i told them '' losing hope and faith'' is something really holding me back now....due to fearfulness of love, i lose hope and faith on myself...keep on doubting on my ability and critizing myself......it caused doubt of who i am named and made and selected by GOD!!! They told me '' don't masked urself to seek for security and comfort from ppl surrounding you in urself....be satisfied with yourselves no matter with ur beauty, weight and height, personallities, race, origin and etc yet it doesn't mean that we don't have to make any improvement in our life.'' so '' girl, jz have a click on ur mindset that ''STOP IT!!! GET OUT OF DEPRESSION!!! STEP OUT!!! YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE NAMED!!! NOT THE EXTRA.....SO U R SPECIAL!!! SO LOVE URSELF!!!'' sounds nice actually.......hehehehehe.....filled up my batteries again and start to stride back into my life......
hmmm......i had been tried so hard to cast off my pain and hurts....had been trying so hard to learn to love this place and such great opportunities in my life.....once i thought '' this chance is so cruel....made me even lost who i am...lost the loved ones.....lost my emotion and smile as well...''
Now, i learn to tressure and appreciate as much as i can coz God had given me a great chance and mission to accomplish in my life....there might be a lots of obstacles, barriers and hardships waving with me...yet it is the only way to make me growing and growing each day either in maturity or spiritually....yeah, God is awesom !!!
amelia and annet did encourage me to have faith as i told them '' losing hope and faith'' is something really holding me back now....due to fearfulness of love, i lose hope and faith on myself...keep on doubting on my ability and critizing myself......it caused doubt of who i am named and made and selected by GOD!!! They told me '' don't masked urself to seek for security and comfort from ppl surrounding you in urself....be satisfied with yourselves no matter with ur beauty, weight and height, personallities, race, origin and etc yet it doesn't mean that we don't have to make any improvement in our life.'' so '' girl, jz have a click on ur mindset that ''STOP IT!!! GET OUT OF DEPRESSION!!! STEP OUT!!! YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE NAMED!!! NOT THE EXTRA.....SO U R SPECIAL!!! SO LOVE URSELF!!!'' sounds nice actually.......hehehehehe.....filled up my batteries again and start to stride back into my life......
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
能解決的事，不必去擔心； 不能解決的事，擔心也沒用。 在順境中感恩、在逆境中依舊心存喜樂 ……
累了，就把心事放下來
最近認識一位美國籍的出家師父，是個很有趣的事情。 特別是他叫我舉起蕃茄汁，跟他說話的經驗。 我們約在新竹的一家茶館，用英文談論著心經，師父用英文跟我解釋因果、輪迴這些事情，這都還不稀奇。 有趣的事情在後頭呢！ 師父一聽完我跟他提到～個人煩惱的時候， 他索性要我左手提起～他剛買的三罐番茄汁， 一邊提著，一邊跟他說話。 可想而知，我左手感覺到疲勞的程度，跟時間成了正比。 也懊惱著為何師父要我一邊提著三罐蕃茄汁，一邊跟他說話。 受不了這樣的酸楚，我自行把左手放下， 卻聽到師父跟我說： 「 Hold it up, and keep talking to me. 」 聽到這樣的話，心理不免起了疑心，我手提的那麼酸， 為何不讓我放下手上的重物，輕鬆地與他對談？ 約莫過了15分鐘，我的左手實在承受不住了，才聽見師父跟我說：「Now you can put it down.」。 看著我狐疑的臉，師父居然笑了出來。
「你不喜歡提著重物跟我說話， 為何你卻喜歡帶著煩惱，過著你的生活呢？ 手酸了，放下就好，對待煩惱，不也是這樣？ 或是這些煩惱，就像是那些番茄汁一樣， 是你自己用手把它們給舉起來的呢？」 有趣的經驗，對吧？
最近我開始這樣的練習， 一手舉起有重量的東西，一邊想著事情。 手酸了，自然會放下手上的東西， 看看有一天，我會不會也學到，心累了，就把心事給放下來。
我們能很容易的放下有形的重物， 卻很難放下無形的重擔。
執著的人生～會讓自己承擔莫需有的重擔。
學習放下執著～也就在學習人生自在。
这是一直在我背后支持鼓励我的师傅send我的email，一个当全世界都把我抛下时，他就像上帝派来的天使一样，让我从死亡的边缘看见一条光线，把我拉了回来。这次我又掉进了更深的山谷，他又像天使一样出现了，虽然看不见他的人，但听见他‘爱的声音’，这样就够了。我又像小孩一样在他面前哭泣和撒娇，感觉好像会到了从前的我们，他总是说‘你要加油，要小心，要专心，要爱自己，要好好照顾自己，要勇敢要坚强，慢慢学习，不要急！！！’他的话总是让我恢复冲力，决定勇敢在走下去，我不配得到的，我却得到了，应该属于他的，我却都有了，我应该珍惜的，谢谢你，上帝派来的天使，我一生最感激的人，上帝会祝福你的，我们一起成长，一起努力，一起成功。。。the most beautiful person...the angel from God....i appreciate you!!! (我喜欢把你形容成青色，因为它好美好善良，不会伤害我，就和你一样。）
累了，就把心事放下來
最近認識一位美國籍的出家師父，是個很有趣的事情。 特別是他叫我舉起蕃茄汁，跟他說話的經驗。 我們約在新竹的一家茶館，用英文談論著心經，師父用英文跟我解釋因果、輪迴這些事情，這都還不稀奇。 有趣的事情在後頭呢！ 師父一聽完我跟他提到～個人煩惱的時候， 他索性要我左手提起～他剛買的三罐番茄汁， 一邊提著，一邊跟他說話。 可想而知，我左手感覺到疲勞的程度，跟時間成了正比。 也懊惱著為何師父要我一邊提著三罐蕃茄汁，一邊跟他說話。 受不了這樣的酸楚，我自行把左手放下， 卻聽到師父跟我說： 「 Hold it up, and keep talking to me. 」 聽到這樣的話，心理不免起了疑心，我手提的那麼酸， 為何不讓我放下手上的重物，輕鬆地與他對談？ 約莫過了15分鐘，我的左手實在承受不住了，才聽見師父跟我說：「Now you can put it down.」。 看著我狐疑的臉，師父居然笑了出來。
「你不喜歡提著重物跟我說話， 為何你卻喜歡帶著煩惱，過著你的生活呢？ 手酸了，放下就好，對待煩惱，不也是這樣？ 或是這些煩惱，就像是那些番茄汁一樣， 是你自己用手把它們給舉起來的呢？」 有趣的經驗，對吧？
最近我開始這樣的練習， 一手舉起有重量的東西，一邊想著事情。 手酸了，自然會放下手上的東西， 看看有一天，我會不會也學到，心累了，就把心事給放下來。
我們能很容易的放下有形的重物， 卻很難放下無形的重擔。
執著的人生～會讓自己承擔莫需有的重擔。
學習放下執著～也就在學習人生自在。
这是一直在我背后支持鼓励我的师傅send我的email，一个当全世界都把我抛下时，他就像上帝派来的天使一样，让我从死亡的边缘看见一条光线，把我拉了回来。这次我又掉进了更深的山谷，他又像天使一样出现了，虽然看不见他的人，但听见他‘爱的声音’，这样就够了。我又像小孩一样在他面前哭泣和撒娇，感觉好像会到了从前的我们，他总是说‘你要加油，要小心，要专心，要爱自己，要好好照顾自己，要勇敢要坚强，慢慢学习，不要急！！！’他的话总是让我恢复冲力，决定勇敢在走下去，我不配得到的，我却得到了，应该属于他的，我却都有了，我应该珍惜的，谢谢你，上帝派来的天使，我一生最感激的人，上帝会祝福你的，我们一起成长，一起努力，一起成功。。。the most beautiful person...the angel from God....i appreciate you!!! (我喜欢把你形容成青色，因为它好美好善良，不会伤害我，就和你一样。）
Saturday, August 1, 2009
second chance....
HAHA!!!
i was so happy to be in the church....
worship.....surrender.....pray......
i loves to do all those.......
makes my heart rest in a peaceful and calm state....
be able to put down all my daily stuffs and burdens and stress....
Second chance to make a significant life now!!!
i had been ''dropped'' yet You always pick me up....always give me a second chance to gain hope and faith....always tell me that You are my saviour and my king........what i need to do is just reach out to You, surrender in Your hands, release in Your embrace and a lots a lots more......
yeah!!! today sermon is on title '' significance'', pastor said '' try to understand excellent by study failure as well as study the insignificance to understand significance''.
3 myths :
i am significant with:
~~ i am being served
~~ i am loved
~~ i am given to...
Yet,
TRUE significance occurs when you :
~~ serve
~~ love
~~ give
yup, i want to make my life significant......find out the key of significance life....need a change....haha.....say easy yet action is hard??
hmmm......it's time to take up and carry back my burdens and responsibilities again for next week when i left the church.....又要从新背起下星期的责任，但我还是希望放下来的那一刻赶快到来.........looking forwards the next weekends.....church......hahahaha.....
i was so happy to be in the church....
worship.....surrender.....pray......
i loves to do all those.......
makes my heart rest in a peaceful and calm state....
be able to put down all my daily stuffs and burdens and stress....
Second chance to make a significant life now!!!
i had been ''dropped'' yet You always pick me up....always give me a second chance to gain hope and faith....always tell me that You are my saviour and my king........what i need to do is just reach out to You, surrender in Your hands, release in Your embrace and a lots a lots more......
yeah!!! today sermon is on title '' significance'', pastor said '' try to understand excellent by study failure as well as study the insignificance to understand significance''.
3 myths :
i am significant with:
~~ i am being served
~~ i am loved
~~ i am given to...
Yet,
TRUE significance occurs when you :
~~ serve
~~ love
~~ give
yup, i want to make my life significant......find out the key of significance life....need a change....haha.....say easy yet action is hard??
hmmm......it's time to take up and carry back my burdens and responsibilities again for next week when i left the church.....又要从新背起下星期的责任，但我还是希望放下来的那一刻赶快到来.........looking forwards the next weekends.....church......hahahaha.....
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