Footprints in the sand

You walk with me,
footprint in the sand,
and help me understand where i'm going,
You walk with me,
when i was all alone,
with so much unknown along the way,
and i heart You say,
i promise you i always there,
when your heart is filled with sorrow and despair,
i'll carry you when you need a friend,
you will find my foodprint in the sand.....

All are going to start, yet i am still unprepared well...felt like so broken..
Don't you heard a story about sand before?? When you hold the sand too tight on your palm, it will flow away from palm more easily. It could be said that holding onto all this too tightly is taking its toll. For instance, tightly holding a relationship, a dream, a past and a future may make you lost all these eventually.

''why? why holding onto all this may make you lost them lastly??'' Ans: in relationship, holding each other too tightly might cause both parties lose their own space and time to reflect themselves. Thus, as time flies, both parties discover that their love has no more space to grow and eventually ends up with HURT. Secondly, in a dream, if we hold too tightly in a particular dream, we might have too high expectations as stress is all around us. Slowly, stress might become the main killer. Thirdly, if we keep on looking or reminiscencing the past either a happy one or a broken one, we might not have the courage or willingness to move on. Afterall, we are still living in the past but not present.

So, need to always remind myself that i am sitting on the front seat, don't bother what's the back n sides going on. Do what i need to do is the most significant task. Tmrw is a start for me as uni starts, there are gonna to be nearly 1500 ppl......Yet, always have a pair of footprint accompany me to walk through the journey.

(To me, i fear, as 1500 ppl seems like a HUGE stone which is gonna to roll to me, to attack me........i have to break the stone and bring back the victory on hands....jiayou!!!)

Timetable HSFY..

Got my timetable today after my HSFY pre-lim lecture....
It was a pretty good one as everyday starts school at 9am and end at 6pm.....
What a timetable could make you to think of how amazing God works in our lives....
everyone of us got the different timetable yet we may have some similarities in certain subjects..
Initially, i am really worried about what if they all together in a lecture yet i am the odd one as there are almost 2000 ppl in HSFY. It's really massive group of ppl, scare me at first when i am doing my eng diagno test, indeed.

However, everyone of us have different timetable as if everyone of us have different life which is well-planned by The Above One. God always creates the best plan for each of us as He knows us well. For instance, i am someone who will not really wake up at early 6 or 7am as i always sleep late although i know it's not a good habits as my biological clock upside down most of the time. So, God let me to have class at 9am and i am the only one who doesn't have classes at 8am every morning among peers . So, i really thanks Lord for that.

Well, apparently, most of my peers back home have lost contact or we have gaps or communication barriers as we are not together most of the time. No one else should be blamed in this kind of situations as it's jz a natural changes in relationship within peers who are thousands miles away from you. However, God always provide enough blessings to everyone of us. He provides friends to me as he knows sometimes we need somebody to build us up in various ways and aspects. His divine love always depicts in little little things which is happening in your life. How great is His LOVE?? immeasurable to me..... =D

Yet, we may have to go to labs or lecs by only ourselves sometimes also show that God wants us to be more independant in everything. We should not be too reliance to peers as they are not someone who will accompany you the whole life or give you an eternal life. Yet, they are always part of our lives as God knows sometimes we need them by our sides =))

Afterall , it's gonna to start as if the great WAR gonna to begin. Am i ready?? i doubted ==

david cook...

If can, i want to get it =))

jz love it so so so much!!!

maybe is the design of the disc itself make me fall in love with it,

Yet, it could be said so that those songs are nice to listen to.....

Songs which may probably

reflect your moods,

enlighten up your days,

comfort your pains,

lull you to sleep,

accompany you through ups and downs.....

Yea....uni life gonna to start very soon...

days will be buzy yet contented i reckon...

might go for the audition for worship team....

will consider and pray about it first of course...

i will work it out =D

God, thanks for giving me heaps of wonderful friends here who i can pour out my heart to...who will support me in everything by building up my faith, who reminds me what to do and what's not to, who advices me what should i do in this very tough year........Thanks God for the bonding of relationship among flatties which i found so hard for me initially. Eventually, things are getting better each day. I start to improve myself in listening and understanding the slang of NZ they are using =D It was great really!!! i am thankful for blessing me with caring ppl all around me, God....I love you!!! =D

尽最大的努力

也许，有时候，
我们不明白为何父母会帮我们做决定，
不了解为何想尽方法改变我们的生活，
甚至怨恨，埋怨他们的操控我们的生命，

可是，你是否想过他们所做的是为你好？
是否明白他们的决定也许对你是最好的？
是否知道他们尽了最大的努力给你最好的？
这全都是因为你是他们的孩子，他们爱你。

爱，可以有很多方法，
每个人表达爱的方式不同，
有人只选择付出，
有人只选择等待，
有人却选择放开，给对方自由，
有人也选择承担，隐藏全部，
有人却会为爱人尽自己最大的努力。

我爸妈为了我尽他们最大的努力让我出国读书，
一开始，我却选择怨恨，埋怨，
从来都没有为他们着想，分担，
这一次，应该换我为了他们尽我最大的努力，
就算跌倒了，也要再爬起来，再尝试，
不管这旅途有多艰难害怕，都不要放弃，
因为爱，让学会我尽最大的努力 =)

看见爸爸劳累的背影，觉得他老了，我该长大了。。。

will do my very best for them as they do theirs for me..... =))

a summary before the new episodes are going to start

Well, i had great times back home this trip although i am encountering with some emotional and relationship problems. However, it was really great that through all this, i had grown more n more in Him. As His divine love endures me through the hardest and broken parts of life.

Today, in the airport, i saw a lots of touching scene. I saw love is all around us yet it's matter on whether we had discovered its either exist or not. There are bunch of friends send off one of their loved one to somewhere. They hug to each others with tears in eyes and mumbled words in ears. It's love among peers. Then, i saw a couple who are going to be separated temporary embrace each other to chest and eventually let go their hands with feelings of not keen to say ''goodbye''. It's love among couples. Lastly,it's my turn to go into the check in counter as the clock stucked to half past 6. I saw mum's eye has already full with tears. I saw dad's unbearable sadness in face. I saw sis's fake n awful smile on face. When the moments we hug each other, my disobidient tears fall non-stopping. I don't even dare to turn my face back to wave with them as i know they are waving to me outside the gate. Isn't called love of family?? My leaving builds up the incredibly stronger relationship in family. Isn't a great things to praise Lord insteads of giving too much complaints and blames??

Well, Birth giving is undeniably a very painful process. Yet, it always birth something new, better and awesome. It could be described as if in a process of letting go a broken relationship of mine. Perhaps, it's indeed a very heart-striking and painful process yet i did learn something new which probably increase my maturity level in handling emotions n problems. Sometimes, God will challenge you through a painful incident or past to teach you how to be rational in handling differents people and problems, either you want to escape from the incoming problems or encountering with your brave soul and heart. I used to choose the earlier one yet this time i am going to take the latter one as my only choice. No more being shaken by various situations.

Haha...i watch a movie on plane today which is on titled ''He's just not into you'' by Jennifer Aniston, Ben Attrack and lots ppl. But, ben is really a cool looking guy (macho guy =D). It teaches me that sometimes happy ending might be picking up the broken parts, framing those broken ones again and just move on as he's just not into you!!! So, what's i going to do is ''just move on!!! Giving in all i can to serve God and ppl but not to wait to be served!!! n My very priority is to study hard to pursue my dream and to glorify His name.'' What mum said is so true '' If you wish to serve people in medical field, either treating the sick to recover or helping people with their teeth, firstly you have to strive hard to fit yourself a place in that field, not just by saying but actions are need to be taken =D ''

Here, i really want to give thanks to Him. Although challenges are given non-stopping and there would be more n more in the coming days, yet, i still want to give thanks.

'' Give thanks with the grateful heart,
Give thanks to the holy one,
Give thanks because he's given,
Jesus Christ, He is the one,
and now let the weak say ''i am strong'',
let the poor say ''i am rich'',
because of what the Lord had done for us,
GIVE THANKS. ''

This hymn lull me to sleep tonight. I promise that no more ''insomnia'', no more ''haunted by the past''....MOVE ON and GIVE THANKS =D

peer love =))

Haha!!! =))

I love teo kahsiong & ea guosheng so much so much man!!!


Kahsiong, there are tears in his eye when we hug before i go off =)) i know how much he is not keen to send me off today. He asked me to ''bear'' in everything till i succeed in my studies. He is a very special friend of mine. We seems to have the same thoughts n minds in almost every situations. It was great and awesome to know him, really!!!



guosheng, he jz so funny!!! takes almost 30 mins to send me to church which is so near to the mall =))) LOLS!!! n He keeps turning into the wrong ways and find excuses that he don't know how to go n which way to go is nearer...LOLS!!! He is jz so cute!!! HAHA...not keen to send me off n let me go but don't know how to express by words yet do funny n stupid actions =)) Yet, i appreciate him lots =)) Thanks for him always be there for me =))



I LOVE THEM HEAPS!!! =)))

Mum said...

I had spent a whole day with family today, esp mum =))
Had a great talk to her today...
She asked me '' are you afraid to go back to nz this time??''
I said '' Why i need to be afraid?? what can i do if i really afraid??''

She said '' I am worried about you, you don't even know how to take care of yourself. How can you survive for another 10 more months?? and one of your cousin is not going back anymore...Do you keen to stay back??''
I said '' If there is a road for me to stay back...i might..But, it seems no road for me to turn back..but the only way is to walk forward....''

She said '' i don't know whether it's right or wrong to send you thousands miles away to take such a big risk all by yourself....it's really confused me sometimes...Do you miss us sometimes??''
I said (with tears in eyes) '' right or not is not significant anymore...although it's wrong, but what can i do now but jz walk on in this journey?? n maybe it's a right choice...jz walk on because God is there to hold me everytime i fall and rejoice with me in happy times. I miss you all when i am alone, when i am doing all the chores and stuffs all by myself, eating meals by myself...and heaps.''

HMM...nothing much i can do now as there is no turning back but jz strive hard in everything n give in the best i can to glorify His name. Me, jz a little one...but never ever give up =)) Coz i am JANE!!! 你会在未来看到我的疯狂因为我给未来的自己希望！！！