blog ah blog....
i know you are the only one willing to hear my grumbling!!!
n now u are the on who are free to hear....
i don't know why my tears jz keep on falling....it's jz like waterfall...non-stopping...
sigh....seminar presentation is coming so soon....i didn't really prepare well....n i have no confidence at all...or it can be said that i don't have any mood to either study or prepare it well....jz randomly let the time flies and i even hope the time passes faster n faster each day...
me...escaping?? avoiding?? scare of?? fear of?? masked myself?? poker face?? too emo n drama?? i can't even really figure out my feelings or mood now!!! It can be described with jz a word ''NUMB''.....
i jz unable to feel anything.....jz numb towards everyday life....how come i become like this??
my life was already so dramatic.....why it couldn't be simple a lil bit?? as simple always goes good!!
hmmm......challenges, expectations, fear, and discourage bring me down!!! yea....undeniably, i am someone who loves to grumble and GRUMBLE!!! But, it's so hard to have someone who i can really grumble with except God!!! He is the healer of everything....n He will walk me through fire...
Well, i don't know why i jz swallow everything that i wanna to speak out.....can't really be honest to ppl n myself...so can't be happy....so there comes a Poker Face!!!
A shoutout : ''AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.......I AM SO TIRED!!! God, give me a way to follow
you, give me miracles, give me courage, give me expectations that will never fails,
shoo away my tears, shoo away disappointments, shoo away everything that's not
belong to me!!! God, if is not belong to me, jz pls don't show me.......God, thank you
everything....and sorry....''
i'm not alright!! jz broken inside.......broken inside.........
Remember last time u told me... 'that was beautiful memories'... u beat down all your troubles and fears before.. and now, 2nd round, who will be the winner? Jane?
ReplyDeletehmmm.....yea...i am not troubled by relationship anymore...n we both didn't contact for a long time...so, i can proudly said that i had let go all!!! n the healing process is tough but i still persevere till the end....hmmm...now, i felt down because many new challenges coming....n i don't know whether i can take it or not...
ReplyDeleteHAHA....God will provide me a good spouse...who will be really really take care of me...and can tahan my grumbling n everything...jz wait la....someone will come if he really love me!!!
Now is the time to grow...n learn how to be strong each day passes by....may not really be the strongest...but at least i am willing to learn to be...coz sometimes we need to be alone...sometimes we may felt discourage...but no matter how...we still need to continue our life...n take it all as a lesson...
what ppl give is more than enough n i am blessed so much to have them by my side...although they are leaving soon...yet, i will still be strong!!! coz God give me one more day to be alive...n i want to learn every single moment!!!
friend, take care....i might not be the winner but at least i win myself n turn to be a better one!!!
Ya.. you also take care... at least u win urself, that is enough.. becuz most of the time, u r the enemy to urself..
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