Regret ?!

After the first day of the new episode of life, i was so stressed. Nah, not only me, but ppl around me were so stressed. Everyone seems to be stressed out. Once finish the first lec of a subject, people rush to the library to revise and REVISE. I really have no idea what can we revise as the first lec is all about the introductions of all subjects that we are taking. Well, ''stress'' can be clearly felt when dorothy and i are lining up to buy the biological physic coursebook n textbook which are only available in a small corner of uni library---uniprint. That's really a LONG queue!!! Duhhhh....

Urghhh....my disobedient stomach was stirring the whole day...kinda like killing me....felt so unwell. But, i still can survive!!! STILL CAN!!! We make it to the early 8 lecture today and finish by 12pm due to no labs this week =)) something to be happy with!!! Then, we go town to find books n printer. Huhu....walking here n there...searching n searching...worrying if we don't manage to find the printer we want. Ink cartridges here are really costly. We want to save as much as we can as we know that those money didn't come so easily. Those are all the ''sweats, tears and blood'' of our parents. So yea...we are really stingy in everything but not to God we promise =)))

After a hard day, finally, i got some times to sit down and take a rest in meanwhile reflects myself in those things i did and the altitude i had for the day. Then, dad calls. He is asking me whether am i good here and can i survive here. I didn't really say much but jz say ''yes, i am okay, don't worry!!! i still can survive as i am your daugther.'' Lastly, he asked me '' are you regret of leaving home and taking such a great risk to get into the course you want??'' I didn't really say anything but my tears fall. It's jz falling. Yet, i told him i didn't regret and i will do my very best for Him and you n mum =)))

No more any thought of regrets in your mind.
Study.Love God n People. Serve. Smile. That's Jane.

shepherd love as lullaby...

Want to have a good, long, sweet sleep tonight...So, this will be a very short entry =))
YEA!! i am listening to ''Shepherd love'' by Keith Routledge in his album ''Everyday With Jesus''..
It is jz a nice song which is entirely played by piano and some instruments (flute n violin maybe).
It is jz a song as lullaby to lull me to sleep sweetly like a baby without worries and stresses or haven't open his eyes to see how the world look like =)

它是一首没有曲的歌，
只有简单却优美的旋律，
但每一个旋律却打动我的心，
仿佛在叫我要快乐，要幸福，

你心里是否一直住着一个人？
他似乎已经深深地刻在你的心，
不管你假装忘了，假装漠不关心，
心里的某个角落都会想知道他好吗，
看到他很好，自己也会多笑一点，
你心里的某个角落是否一直住着这样的他？？

我学会了如何把心里的那个他埋藏起来，再也不去碰，再也不多想，就这样，我们都笑了。。。

let it go....

Hmm.....i supposed to accomplish my seminar presentation by tonight....but, i did blogging again...

Today, i realized everything had changed even human's heart....
Finally, i realized that relationship is jz a need....a need of we both yet it's not love tho....
I didn't have disappointments after finishing the ''Hi-Bye'' process...i jz felt so relieved coz i did it!!!

LET IT GO...
something which is not mine n yours,
something which is jz a need n comfort,
something which is all in the rush,
something which sincerity is fake,

LET IT GO...
something which we did wrong..
something which cause hurts....
something which is no return paid...
something which is impossible...

previously, i thought ''let it go'' is jz a phrase which is extremely hard to turn it to action, yet, experience is the best teacher to teach us the way we should do to stop ourselves from suffering. What a relief ?! ''LET IT GO'' is jz need a heart with willingness and forgiveness...once you decided to let go, u must have a fixed heart. To have a fixed heart means to have our mind made up so that we are not going to change it.

A steadfast heart....
everything changed....
you n her or the 'she'....
not my matters anymore...
perhaps a ''Hi-Bye'' is a surplus...
yet ''friendly'' is my nature...
if felt annoying...jz ignored....
i can able to take it...
as i already did my part as a friend...

A steadfast heart....
i jz want to be determined...
stay positive and happy...
walk in the peace of God...

''sometimes, what i need is jz a listening ears which can bear my grumbling esp when the moment ''i am not alright''........n that's all....''

rolling my tiring eyes...listening to the songs....and it's time to continue my assignment....hmmm....GO!! gO!! Go!!!