Am i gutless?

Haiz....i always asking myself ' Am i too gutless? ' and ' why am i so afraid of f6?' Actually, i really don't know why am i so gutless to study f6. Maybe i hate stress and competition, i hate ppl laughing at my poor result if i study f6, i hate friends who will become enemies during exam, i hate the teachers who are irresponsible in teaching and i hate the feeling of hurting and abandoning by friends. So, i want to have a change.....


I was a girl who liked to rely and depend on my friends, esp him. He is the only one who really understands me. He always reminds me to work hard and pay attention in my studies...teaches me addmath, akaun, chemistry and physics...cares about my meals when we have extra class...reminds me to bring those important notes and books to school because i am a "blur girl" and even knows that i only use the second piece of tissue paper...i am extremely grateful to God as He had given me a great helper and perfect angel who had accompanied 5 years in stk. I must not to be so greedy to ask for more. I must be satisfied. I told him ' i will not be able to live and study myself, i need u to guide, teach and help me because i m not that smart!!! I am careless and gutless too! I afraid of many things!!' But he said 'U must grow up, be mature, be independant, be strong and i believe that u can do it as u are a girl with strong determination!!' After i heard his encouragement, i told myself :' It's the time to grow up, Jane!!!'

I am not gutless!! I just want to study happily!! I just want to be Jane who loves to smile!! so, pls stop laughing and saying 'u r GUTLESS!!!' I know i am too cares about critism of ppl to me coz sometimes it hurts my heart deeply. However, i know that as a christian i must not care about the critism of ppl...because ' everyone is specially made by God and we are special in His eyes.'